yes i'm cold

this is my official song of january. i love it so much.

and now for a dream i'm going to call semi-lucid, since at one point i looked around (i was sitting on the hood of my car in my driveway in the sunshine with mark), and said, "hey. hey. is this a dream? seriously, is this a dream?" (mark shrugged.)

i saw some far-off birds in the sky, and said, "if this is a dream i'd like one of those birds to fly down here and land on my finger!" i kind of mentally manipulated a bird-like thing to hop up to me on the ground, but it wasn't quite...right. "that's more like a dog than a bird," said mark. it sort of had fur, and it was remarkably minnow-colored. "that doesn't count."

just then, a bird, a very real bird, tiny and with blue and gray feathers, landed on my finger.

but later, having proven to myself that it was a dream, i forgot. isaac was in fifth grade, and i kept counting on my fingers trying to figure out how many years he'd been at his (elementary) school. the kitchen was full of weird-looking leftover baked goods. there were several squares of a beige-colored birthday cake isaac had brought home from school (the birthday kid's name, he told me, was lucid jonathan*) there was some kind of spun-sugar decorative stuff on top that shattered like glass when i put a fork into the cake.**


*my subconscious was trying so hard to remind me that we were dealing with a dream here! also, i've been listening to bbc radio too much, on which they're constantly talking about the president of nigeria.

**i'm a little embarrassed about how often my dreams involve baked goods.