portland. begging your pardon, but you're kind of getting on my nerves today. it's one of those days when the city seems to be full of two kinds of people: unfriendly, scrawny, tattooed hipsters and overly-friendly, scrawny, tattooed meth* addicts pushing strollers. besides the strollers, the way you can tell the difference is that the hipsters have white, expensively-straightened teeth. the addicts have significantly fewer teeth.
then i have to remind myself: the woman at gogi is so nice, as is the man at yordprom. the hipster barista didn't mean to offend when she called me "ma'am," nor did the addict-dad who advised me to get mirrored sunglasses so i could see behind me and be able to tell when someone's checking out my ass.
*or heroin? oxycontin? "bath salts"?
4 comments:
I can say nothing comforting except this: you don't need the glasses. Everyone is checking out your ass. :-)
Hey, what about the thrilling interlude you spent chez moi, where there was neither a hipster nor an addict in sight? That's part of Portland too! But actually what I meant to say is that I need to get out more and this is a really, really funny post.
Oh, excusez-moi! I see now that this post was from yesterday.....
melissa, that cheers me immensely. mama d, it is always a pleasure, and i didn't see a single addict with a stroller when i was in your 'hood today!
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